In Bed With Alexa: Have Better Sex

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with gynecologist, sexual medicine expert, and author Dr. Maria Sophocles to talk openly about painful sex, vaginal health, sexual pleasure, menopause, low desire, and everything in between. Topics discussed: Why does sex hurt? How common is painful sex, and when should you see a doctor? Dr. Maria Sophocles breaks down the most common causes of sexual pain, including vaginal dryness and inadequate lubrication, lack of arousal, vaginismus and a hypertonic pelvic floor, dermatologic conditions such as lichen sclerosus, STIs including herpes, chlamydia and gonorrhea, and internal causes such as endometriosis, ovarian cysts, fibroids and scarring. Alexa and Dr. Sophocles also get into why lubrication isn't the same thing as arousal, the importance of taking time before penetration, sexual scripting, communication with your partner, the orgasm gap, faking orgasms, low libido and desire differences, and why treating pain can sometimes bring sexual desire back. They discuss estrogen, genitourinary syndrome of menopause, perimenopause, postpartum and breastfeeding-related changes, surgical menopause, chemotherapy, vaginal estrogen, systemic estrogen, birth control and its potential effects on dryness and libido, as well as pelvic floor physical therapy, Kegels and pelvic floor relaxation. The conversation also covers PMS and period symptoms, breast tenderness, mood changes, back pain, exercise, sleep, meditation, mindfulness, magnesium, ibuprofen, vitamin E and evening primrose oil. Pap smears, trauma during gynecological exams, pediatric speculums, lubricant during Pap testing, and the future of at-home HPV/Pap sample collection. They also play fact vs.fiction on cotton underwear, synthetic underwear, thongs, tight leggings, sweating after workouts, panty liners, vaginal discharge, vulva washing, soap, feminine washes, vaginal pH, normal genital odor, BV, boric acid, antibiotics, the vaginal microbiome, diet, fermented foods, probiotics/microbiome testing, vulvar irritation, pubic hair and friction. Follow Dr. Sophocles:Instagram: @mariasophoclesmd Website: www.mariasophoclesmd.com Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2638-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with sex educator Jill Lissner, aka @sexedprincesss, forconversation about performative sex, pleasure, body image, consent, communication, and the weird sex trends taking over the internet. Topics covered: Performative sex and what it means Pleasure vs. performance Authentic/non-performative sex Gendered expectations around appearance Penis size, erections and stamina Moaning and performing sounds Staying quiet because of shame or expectations Soft penises and body acceptance Decentering penetration Mutual masturbation and vulnerability Porn as a performance Being perceived and worrying how you look Likeability, acceptance and social performance Reducing performance anxiety through exposure “Spectatoring” during sex Advocating for your needs during sex Defaulting to giving as a performance Preference vs. performance Orgasm faces “Cracked” and modern sexual terminology Active participation in sex Riding/on-top positions and performing for appearance Recording sexual experiences Penetration as a performance expectation Critical thinking about sexual norms Internet sex trends Ball maxing/scrotum maxing Scrotum size and attraction How sexual trends spread online The need for more scientific research on emerging sex trends Follow Jill:Instagram: @sexedprincesss Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with Small Hands (Aaron Thompson) to talk about what really creates sexual attraction, the difference between confidence and competence, rough sex, kink, consent, boundaries, and the fantasies people don't always know how to talk about. In this episode: Non-sexual turn-ons and how they become sexual turn-ons Hands, feet, scent and other physical turn-ons Acts of service, chores, cleaning and thoughtfulness as turn ons Appreciation, validation and keeping long-term relationships connected Boundary talks before professional collaborations Reading someone's comfort level and adjusting in the moment Sexual toys, magic wands, lube and taking initiative Confidence vs. competence Why competence may be more attractive than confidence Humility, ego and letting actions speak for themselves Sexual performance anxiety and the pressure to “deliver” Small Hands' first gangbang and early experiences in porn CNC (consensual non-consent) fantasies Dark fantasies and the importance of genuine desire and safety Kink, trauma and how life experiences can shape sexual interests Reclaiming autonomy through fantasy The unexpected origins of a foot fetish What “rough sex” actually means Physical, verbal and psychological elements of rough sex Why rough sex requires context, intent and communication Rough sex vs. disrespect Consent, boundaries and negotiating BDSM/kink Choking and assuming a partner wants it Hot ways of checking in during sex Why porn should never be treated as a guide for real-life behavior Trust and safety as foundations for exploring darker fantasies Small Hands' private fantasy of slow, romantic, sensual sex Follow Aaron: Instagram: @thesmallhands_ Follow Alexa Andre: Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2633-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in back bed with Dr. Evan Goldstein, founder of Bespoke Surgical, creator of Future Method, and author of Butt Seriously . They discuss anal health, pleasure, preparation, and all the questions people are often too embarrassed to ask. Topics discussed in this episode: Anal pleasure and breaking down taboos and myths Exploring anal stimulation for the first time The P-spot/prostate and prostate orgasms The A-spot and anal pleasure for women Topping vs. bottoming Why tops should understand anal anatomy Anal foreplay and gradual penetration The three sphincter muscles Breathing, relaxation and communication Pain, bleeding and discomfort during anal sex Lube and why anal sex differs from vaginal sex Penis size, thickness and anatomy Mushroom-shaped penises and preparation Bad first anal experiences Self-exploration and masturbation Pressure vs. in-and-out stimulation Riding and controlling penetration Dilators and gradual anal training Anatomy vs. psychological/neurological factors Bleeding, tightness and when to seek medical care Poop during anal sex Shame and anxiety around cleanliness Douching and over-douching Gut health, fiber and diet Prebiotics and probiotics Food and how diet can affect anal sex Condoms and anal sex PrEP and DoxyPEP The “toy test” after douching Hemorrhoids and what they actually are Fissures and skin tags Pegging and strap-on play Prostate massage and prostate milking Edging and gooning Anal Botox and pelvic floor physical therapy Butt facials Butt acne, ingrown hairs and hair removal Wet wipes and anal irritation Bidets and portable bidets Toilet paper vs. water-based cleaning Evan's work with Bespoke Surgical and Future Method Follow Dr. G:Instagram: @drevangoldstein | @bespokesurgical | @thefuturemethod Website and more: Bespoke Surgical Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2633-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Dr. Evan Goldstein , founder of Bespoke Surgical, creator of Future Method, and author of Butt Seriously . They do a deep dive into anal sex, butt health, and everything you've always wanted to ask about your asshole. Topics Discussed Dr. Evan Goldstein's journey from heart surgery to anal surgery Coming out and discovering anal health as a medical specialty Cosmetic vs. functional anal procedures Hemorrhoids, fissures, skin tags, and anal anatomy Post-pregnancy anal changes Grooming injuries and anal skin concerns Confidence and body image around the anus Anal bleaching and whether it's worth it Perineum "sunning" What makes a "healthy" vs. "perfect" asshole The truth about anal douching Protecting the anal microbiome Why over-douching can increase STI and HIV risk Future Method and isotonic douching Safe products to use in the anus Can anal sex make you loose? Incontinence myths Male vs. female pelvic anatomy Anal Botox When surgery is necessary Dilators for beginners Fingering mistakes that cause injuries Proper lubrication Relaxation techniques for anal penetration Understanding the three anal sphincters The three "types" of assholes Building up to anal safely How often bottoms should practice Fiber, probiotics, hydration, and digestive health Whether everyone needs to douche Preparing for occasional anal sex The prostate (P-spot) The A-spot Prostate orgasms Common myths surrounding anal sex How to reduce injury while maximizing pleasure Follow Dr. G:Instagram: @drevangoldstein | @bespokesurgical | @thefuturemethod Website and more: Bespoke Surgical Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Carly, founder of Read Aurore, to talk about why written erotica is becoming one of the most powerful tools for pleasure, communication and self-discovery. Together they explore how true erotic stories differ from fantasy, why women are increasingly choosing erotica over visual porn, the psychology behind imagination and desire, how writing about sex can help process emotions and improve communication, and how reading erotica can inspire better sex and stronger relationships. Topics discussed: Carly's path to creating Aurora Erotica Interviewing strangers about sex Dating in Europe vs New York Vacation confidence and sexual freedom Why true stories are hotter than fantasy Turning real experiences into erotica Writing as emotional processing First-time sex that is actually good Why men should read erotica Women's real sexual desires Affairs and taboo fantasies Open relationships vs secret affair How Aurore selects submissions Writing as therapy Rewriting difficult experiences Smut vs erotica Romance vs erotica The decline in Gen Z sexual activity Benefits of reading erotica Benefits of writing erotica Reliving pleasurable experiences Reading erotica together as foreplay Follow Carly:Instagram: @readaurore Website: readaurore.com Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2629-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with clinical psychologist and relationship coach Gaby Balsells to unpack one of the hardest questions in love: how do you know whether to stay in a relationship or walk away? Together they explore: how to tell the difference between a temporary rough patch and true incompatibility the danger of ignoring red flags during the honeymoon phase emotional vs. sexual compatibility settling vs. honoring your needs trusting your desires healthy communication overcoming defensiveness becoming "us vs. the problem” emotional labor the initiator/receiver dynamic why actions matter more than words consistency over empty promises repairing conflict, couples therapy, sexual compatibility, mismatched libidos & feeling desired knowing when you've waited long enough guilt around leaving selective effort & weaponized incompetence and why love alone isn't always enough Follow Gaby:Instagram: @gabybalsells Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with urologist Dr. Jed Kaminet sky to unpack everything you need to know about men's sexual health: from vasectomies, erectile dysfunction, testosterone, fertility, sperm count, pornography, performance anxiety, lifestyle habits, microplastics, prostate health, post-nut clarity, and why great sex is about so much more than penetration. In this episode, Dr. Jed shares insights from performing over 6,000 vasectomies , explains why vasectomies don't affect erections, orgasms, ejaculation, libido, or masculinity, and discusses who should (and shouldn't) get one. We also dive into why more young men are experiencing erectile dysfunction, the difference between psychological and physical ED, performance anxiety, refractory periods, Viagra vs. Cialis, low testosterone, healthy ways to increase testosterone naturally, pornography's impact on arousal, penis pumps and rings, fertility, declining sperm counts, microplastics, prostate health, ejaculation frequency, steroids, testosterone therapy, men's fears around penis size, micro-penis stigma, post-nut clarity and more. Topics discussed: ​Dr. Jed's experience performing 6,000+ vasectomies ​Why vasectomies don't affect erections, orgasms, ejaculation or libido ​Who should and shouldn't get a vasectomy ​Vasectomy reversals and success rates ​More childfree men choosing vasectomies ​Psychological vs. physical erectile dysfunction ​Performance anxiety and first-time sex nerves ​What erectile dysfunction actually means ​Lifestyle causes of ED (sleep, obesity, smoking, alcohol, exercise) ​Stress, anxiety and blood flow to the penis ​Refractory periods and why they change with age ​Viagra, Cialis and how they work ​Daily Cialis vs. as-needed dosing ​Testosterone testing and common misconceptions ​Natural ways to increase testosterone ​Weightlifting vs. endurance running for hormone health ​Penis pumps and cock rings ​Pornography, masturbation habits and sexual conditioning ​Low libido vs. erectile dysfunction ​Fertility, declining sperm counts and modern lifestyle ​Microplastics and male fertility ​Sauna use, heat exposure and sperm health ​Prostate enlargement, prostate cancer and ejaculation research ​Steroids, bodybuilding and infertility ​Testosterone replacement therapy risks ​Women's testosterone and libido ​Post-nut clarity explained ​Why men's physiology isn't an excuse to neglect a partner's orgasm ​Communication, sex therapy and relationship dynamics ​Micro-penis myths and penis size insecurity ​Why erectile dysfunction is a symptom, not a disease Follow Dr. Jed:Instagram: @drjedkaminetsky Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2629-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with Coral Osborne (@theunrealcoralosborne), sexologist, intimacy coach for men, former sex worker, and writer. Coral shares how sex work has changed over the last decade, why the industry has become increasingly polarized, and why she believes decriminalization matters for safety and autonomy. She opens up about the realities behind influencer culture, escorting, OnlyFans, AI, the loneliness epidemic, and why becoming a content creator today is harder than ever. The conversation takes a deeply personal turn as Coral recounts hiring a male escort, what she hoped to experience, why it didn't unfold as expected, and what the experience revealed about vulnerability, performance, pleasure, and intimacy. Topics discussed: The changing landscape of sex work over the past decade Political divides and hypocrisy within the sex industry Escort culture in Los Angeles, New York, Dubai, and Las Vegas Why older sex workers often earn more than younger ones The rise of OnlyFans and if it’s easy to become a millionaire The loneliness epidemic and why AI won't replace real intimacy Building an audience on social media without sacrificing integrity Writing vulnerable essays on Substack Why Coral hired a male escort What it felt like to be on the client side of sex work Performance anxiety from a woman's perspective Receiving versus giving pleasure Faking orgasms and learning how to stop performing Oral sex, vulnerability, and intimacy Dating after leaving sex work Meeting her current boyfriend and navigating honesty early on Why intimacy and transaction can coexist Double standards around dating former sex workers Lived experience versus academic credentials in sex education Why coaches should continue investing in their own healing Using relationship tools like Yes/No/Maybe lists and relationship menus Bringing curiosity and intentional communication into long-term relationships Follow Coral Osborne:Instagram: @theunrealcoralosborne Substack: https://substack.com/@coralosborne Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with sex educator, relationship coach, and OnlyFans creator Ashley Manta for a deep dive into pussy worship, oral sex, receiving pleasure, and what truly creates incredible sex. They discuss what pussy worship actually means, why enthusiasm and verbal reassurance matter and creating safety for the receiver. Topics covered: What pussy worship really is Why enthusiasm changes everything Verbal reassurance before oral sex Creating emotional safety during sex The ideal 60-minute pussy worship session Foreplay being needed before oral sex Labia massage techniques Consent before penetration Pleasure-focused vs orgasm-focused sex Tension orgasms vs relaxed orgasms Betty Dodson's orgasm techniques Breathing through orgasm Why sex educators have higher standards Escaping performative sex Raising your standards for pleasure Porn vs real-life sex Learning to receive instead of always giving Overcoming people-pleasing in bed Mutual masturbation as education Giving and receiving feedback during sex Hormonal changes and changing preferences Pussy worship fantasies Bisexual experiences and women's play parties Breast worship and body worship Toys during oral and hand sex Why everyone should use lube Oral-anal hygiene tips Choosing partners who prioritize your pleasure Follow Ashley Manta:Instagram: @cannasexual Website: pussywhisperer.coach Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2629-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Vee and Elle from the Girls Gone Deep podcast for Part 2/2. Together they explore whether non-monogamy is really about unmet needs, what happens when a partner satisfies nearly everything you're looking for, the role of new relationship energy in long-term relationships, primary partnerships versus non-hierarchical polyamory, freedom and autonomy in love, catching feelings for people who aren't a match, maintaining boundaries despite intense attraction, and the science behind oxytocin, dopamine, attachment, and post-sex bonding. They also unpack cream pies, breeding kinks, ownership versus feeling chosen, BDSM dynamics, worship, possessiveness, fertility awareness methods, Oura Ring tracking, vasectomies, accidental pregnancy stories, relationship satisfaction, energetic pleasure, arousal, and what it really means to build a "bulletproof pussy." Topics Discussed Whether non-monogamy is fundamentally about unmet needs Can one person satisfy all your emotional, sexual, and relational needs? New relationship energy (NRE) and its role in long-term relationships Catching feelings for people who aren't a good match Oxytocin, dopamine, endorphins, and attachment after sex Bacterial vaginosis (BV): causes, treatment, recurrence, and prevention Yeast infections and recurring vaginal health issues Gut health's connection to vaginal health Creating a “bulletproof pussy” Sleep, alcohol, drugs and sex UTIs and post-sex hygiene Self-checking vaginal health through scent and taste Cream pies, breeding kinks, and why people find them attractive Accidental pregnancy stories Ownership, possessiveness, worship, and feeling chosen BDSM dynamics and core desires in sex Follow Girls Gone Deep:Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Vee and Elle from the Girls Gone Deep podcast for an honest conversation about sexuality, identity, motherhood, non-monogamy, desire, dating, pleasure, and why "sluthood" has nothing to do with how much sex you're having. Together they explore whether you can still be a slut while celibate, the difference between sex positivity and sluthood, and why owning your desires without shame is at the heart of sexual empowerment. Topics Covered: • Why "sluthood" is a mindset, not a body count• Sex positivity vs. sluthood• Owning sexual desires and boundaries• Polyamory and relationship de-escalation• Solo poly life and finding a new primary partner• BDSM dynamics, D/s relationships, and sexual compatibility• Playing together vs. playing separately in non-monogamous relationships• Feeling sexually satiated in long-term partnerships• Asexuality, demisexuality, and the ace spectrum• Whether you can be an asexual slut• Anonymous sex vs. sex with emotional connection• Sex parties and sex-positive communities• Building trust, safety, and desire with recurring partners• Female arousal, nervous system safety, and orgasm• Why one pregnancy can feel completely different from another• Postpartum sexuality and loss of desire• Returning to sex after giving birth• Masturbation during pregnancy and postpartum• First postpartum orgasms and sexual rediscovery• Oral sex, receiving pleasure, and people-pleasing tendencies• Why some women struggle to receive• "Real eaters" and enthusiastic oral sex partners• The psychology of receiving pleasure• The Wheel of Consent• Foreplay, full-body arousal, and erotic anticipation• Female desire and what actually creates arousal• Grinding, making out, and erotic tension• Bad kissers and sexual compatibility• What makes oral sex feel incredible• Leaving casual sex behind• Dating with intention• Childfree dating and relationship dealbreaker• Having sex on the first date• Slow burns versus instant chemistry• Building tension before sex• Boundaries, self-control, and emotional attachment• Future sexual adventures and lifestyle goals Follow Girls Gone Deep:Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2624-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with porn historian, writer, and adult industry expert Noelle Perdue for a fascinating conversation about pornography, fantasy, sexuality, kink, technology, trauma, aging, relationships, and the hidden ways porn shapes our world. Noelle shares her unlikely journey from software developer to porn scriptwriter, her work with Pornhub and the adult industry, and why she believes pornography is one of the most misunderstood cultural forces of our time. Together, Alexa and Noelle unpack the relationship between porn and real-life sexuality, whether porn influences behavior, the myths surrounding porn addiction, the role of fantasy, kink exploration, sex education, censorship, free speech, technology, consent, and how pornography impacts legislation, culture, and online platforms. The conversation also explores giantess fetishism, size kink culture, porn parodies, queer sexuality, healing after sexual trauma, alternative forms of intimacy, body image, aging, MILF culture, hookup communication, sex work, human trafficking misconceptions, and why people are often far more sexually diverse than they realize. Whether you're curious about porn's role in society, interested in sexual exploration, or simply want a deeper understanding of human desire, this episode offers an honest, nuanced, and thought-provoking perspective. Topics discussed: • How Noelle became a porn historian• Leaving tech to write porn scripts• Writing porn parodies for major studios• Working with Brazzers and Pornhub• Pornography's influence on technology and culture• Section 230 explained• FOSTA-SESTA and online censorship• Sex work vs. human trafficking• Porn and free speech debates• Does porn affect relationships?• Porn addiction and dependency myths• Porn as a tool for exploration• Why porn should not replace sex education• Fantasy vs. reality in sexual desire• The dangers of using porn as sex ed• Giantess fetish and SizeCon• Expansion fetishes and breast expansion• Vore and consumption fantasies• Alternative forms of intimacy• Expansive definitions of sex• Communicating desires with partners• Casual sex and queer relationship dynamics• Why sexual communication matters• The popularity of MILF content• Body diversity in porn• Criticisms of pornography• The "teen" category debate• Pornography as a reflection of culture• Sexual violence and porn studies• Gooning culture explained Follow Noelle:Instagram: @all_day_breakfast_ Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with sex educator Tara Michaela for a nuanced conversation about the ethics of public sex, public play, PDA, kink visibility, consent, social norms, and why society struggles to define where the line actually is. Together they unpack whether public sexuality is inherently unethical, why people are drawn to public play and exhibitionism, the role of novelty and desire, and how context changes our perception of what's acceptable. They explore everything from making out in public, wearable vibrators, public bathrooms, sex in cars, beach hookups, PDA at parties, BDSM at Pride, leash dynamics in public spaces, sex-positive parenting, children witnessing nontraditional expressions of sexuality, consent education, sex negativity, and the difference between legality and ethics. They also discuss whether bystanders can truly consent to what they encounter in public, how social norms shape our reactions to sexuality, why people react so strongly online, how consent is often taught as a black-and-white concept despite living in gray areas, and why intent and impact both matter in conversations about consent violations. Topics discussed: • public sex vs. public play • PDA, making out, and cultural attitudes toward affection • Why public play is exciting and appealing • Novelty, desire, exhibitionism, and fantasy fulfillment • Wearable vibrators and remote-control sex toys in public • The ethics of public sexual behavior • Consent and uninvolved bystanders • Social norms versus personal freedom • The difference between legality and morality • Being the "naked neighbor" and visibility at home • BDSM visibility in public spaces • Kink at Pride and public kink discourse • Walking a submissive on a leash in public • Public conversations about sex and sexual experiences • Elevator conversations, social etiquette, and discomfort • Consent education and its limitations • Intent versus impact in consent violations • Ethical gray areas in sexuality • Sex on the beach and secluded public spaces • Sex in cars and privacy expectations • Public bathrooms and ethical considerations • PDA at parties, raves, and social gatherings • Exhibitionism and safer alternatives • Sex parties and kink events as consensual spaces • Online outrage and reactions to sexual content • How sexuality can challenge and change social norms Follow Tara: Instagram: @yourexgirlfriendtara Follow Alexa Andre: Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2624-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Norma Buster, sex positive victims rights advocate, Chief of Staff at CA Goldberg Law, survivor of image-based abuse, and online sex worker, for a raw and nuanced conversation about stalking, leaked intimate images, deepfake abuse, consent, shame, sexuality, healing, OnlyFans, bisexuality, and reclaiming agency after trauma. Topics Covered: Norma Buster’s experience with stalking and image-based abuse Why “revenge porn” is an inaccurate and harmful term The evolution of image-based sexual abuse laws Victim blaming from judges, police, and society Trauma, shame, and psychological impact after leaked intimate images CA Goldberg Law and victims rights advocacy The federal Take It Down Act Why intent-to-harm clauses make prosecutions harder Free speech debates surrounding image-based abuse laws AI deepfakes and nudifying apps Deepfake abuse affecting women, minors, and students Consent, impact vs intent, and digital privacy Supporting friends through stalking or abuse Victim vs survivor terminology and trauma identity Purity culture and sexual shame Bisexual awakening during the pandemic Dating couples and exploring non-monogamy Threesomes and alternative relationship dynamics Healing through sexuality and sex positivity Starting an OnlyFans after surviving image-based abuse Sex work stigma and online identity Reclaiming agency and personal autonomy Advice for survivors struggling with shame and harassment Follow Norma Buster:Instagram: @normabuster_ CA Goldberg Law: cagoldberglaw.com Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2619-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with hypnotherapist, content creator, and non-monogamy advocate Kate Shelor for an unfiltered conversation about open relationships, outsourcing fantasies, emotional labor in swinging, and the surprising ways long-term couples keep intimacy exciting. Kate opens up about why she rarely dates outside her marriage despite being ethically non-monogamous, how hiring sex workers simplified their relationship dynamic, and the realities of jealousy, chemistry, group play, and sexual compatibility. They also dive into anal sex, fantasies, OnlyFans attention, emotional burnout, aging, confidence, kink exploration, and the difference between fantasy and real-life sex. Topics covered: Ethical non-monogamy & swinging Why Kate rarely wants other partners Being a sex educator while dating Being intimidating or “unapproachable” Emotional labor in open relationships Using escorts and sex workers as a couple Negotiating fantasies and boundaries Why paying for sex can be simpler than dating Outsourcing anal and mismatched sexual interests Jealousy, communication, and trust in marriage Male vs female sex workers Exploring kinks safely Why group sex stopped being exciting Realistic female orgasms vs porn fantasy Aging, hormones, and changing libido OnlyFans, validation, and sexual attention online Keeping long-term relationships exciting Matching underwear subscriptions Cruise playrooms and glory hole adventures Novelty, intimacy, and maintaining attraction

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with… herself for a raw, unfiltered solo episode catching you up on everything from life on a Temptation Cruise to her evolving dating standards, sexual boundaries, and relationship mindset. Alexa shares what it’s like attending a Temptation/Desire-style cruise solo for the first time (people-watching couples, navigating swinger culture, and breaking down exactly how playrooms, workshops, and non-monogamous dynamics work in real life). She dives into her personal shift away from casual sex and into intentional dating, explaining why she’s now prioritizing emotional connection, aftercare, and partners who genuinely meet her needs, especially when it comes to oral sex. The episode explores deeper questions around monogamy vs. non-monogamy, whether one partner can meet all your needs, and how exposure to different relationship styles can expand your perspective, whether you ever practice them or not. She also shares behind-the-scenes insights into her workshops, from pussy worship to anal education, and what it’s like teaching pleasure in a fully immersive, hands-on environment. Topics Covered Swinger cruise culture: Temptation & Desire breakdown Playroom rules, dynamics, and etiquette Workshops: pussy worship, anal 101, handjob techniques Observing newbies vs experienced couples in non-monogamy Community, connection, and friendships on lifestyle cruises Using pleasure and joy as a form of balance in a difficult world Transition from casual sex to intentional dating Sexual dissatisfaction and unmet needs in casual dynamics The importance of oral sex and prioritizing female pleasure The orgasm gap and stimulation differences during penetration “Real eater only” mindset and not settling sexually Monogamy vs non-monogamy reflections Fluid relationship identities and changing over time Learning from different relationship structures Expanding social circles: queer, kinky, celibate, non-monogamous perspectives Masturbation and solo pleasure practices Behind-the-scenes of sex workshops and teaching live experiences STI education gaps and common fears Orgies, private room dynamics, and cruise experiences Community vs sex focus in lifestyle spaces Building a career as a sex educator and coach Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2619-alexa Temptation Cruises Info Desire Cruises Info

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with Ashley Manta to explore the world of energetic sex: what it is, how it works, and whether you can actually feel pleasure, connection, or even orgasm without physical touch. They break down the concept of the energetic body vs the physical body, how breath, presence, and visualization play a role in directing energy, and how practices rooted in tantra, mindfulness, and somatic awareness can expand what we think of as sex. Ashley explains how energy can be shared between partners (with consent), how couples can sync breath and build intimacy without touch, and how techniques like eye gazing, chakra visualization, and intention-setting are used in workshops. The conversation covers everything from solo exploration to partnered experiences like “energetic penetration,” heart-to-heart connection exercises, and combining touch with energy to enhance sensation. They also discuss real workshop experiences where beginners reported feeling physical sensations, emotional releases, and even orgasms while fully clothed. Topics discussed: What “energetic sex” is Energetic body vs physical body Breathwork and presence in sexual experiences Visualization and directing energy Solo energetic pleasure practices Partnered energetic connection Eye gazing and breath syncing Chakra system and energy movement Hand energy exercise (feeling energy between palms) Energetic “penetration” concept Combining physical touch with energy Workshop experiences and beginner reactions Reports of no-touch orgasms Emotional and somatic responses (shaking, release) Building confidence in energetic practices Energetic kink and power dynamics Energetic restraint and roleplay Tuning into a partner’s “frequency” Feedback cues and responsiveness Breath orgasms vs other orgasm types Laughgasms, coregasms, and non-traditional orgasms Expanding definitions of pleasure Self-pleasure and manifestation practices Using orgasmic energy for intention-setting Longer orgasm experiences Tantra workshops and festivals Tantric massage (what it may involve) Skepticism vs openness Long-distance energetic connection Phone sex using energy and visualization Alexa’s personal experiment and results

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with Star Stone to unpack her real-life experience inside OneTaste, the controversial “orgasmic meditation” (OM) community often described as a sex cult. Star shares how she was drawn in while searching for better sex and multiple orgasms, what “OMing” actually is, and how quickly curiosity turned into something much more complex. From communal living and blurred consent to coercion, confusion, and trauma bonding, this episode dives deep into the psychological dynamics of cult-like environments and how they operate under the guise of empowerment and sexual wellness. We talk about why people join, how boundaries get blurry, what makes leaving so difficult, and what healing looked like afterward. Star also opens up about rebuilding her relationship to sex, safety, and intimacy after the experience. We also cover the recent sentencing of OneTaste founder Nicole Daedone and what accountability, justice, and systemic change actually look like in cases like this. Topics covered: How Star first discovered OneTaste What “orgasmic meditation” actually is and how it works Wanting to become multi-orgasmic and seeking better sex The structure of OM classes and partner pairing Why the first experience didn’t work but still hooked her Moving into communal “OM houses” Sharing beds with strangers and lack of privacy House rules and daily OM expectations Confusion as a control tactic in cult dynamics Pressure to override boundaries and say yes Consent vs coercion in group environments “Lean into discomfort” and loss of autonomy Sexual dynamics, power, and unsafe partner experiences Trauma bonding and cycles of abuse Why it’s hard to leave cult-like environments The role of belonging, community, and vulnerability Leaving the house vs leaving the organization Therapy, treatment, and understanding narcissistic abuse Processing trauma through art, comedy, and storytelling Life after OneTaste and rebuilding sexual safety How the experience impacted her sex life and relationships Learning boundaries, discernment, and partner selection Moving to Costa Rica for healing and nervous system reset Writing and performing her one-woman show Humor as a tool for processing trauma Cult psychology and why smart people still join Justice vs systemic change in cases of sexual exploitation At the time of this episode, Star chose not to speak in detail about the legal case. However, here are the key verified facts: Nicole Daedone was sentenced to 9 years in federal prison in March 2026 for forced labor conspiracy Co-defendant Rachel Cherwitz received 78 months (6.5 years) Prosecutors said the organization used psychological, emotional, and financial coercion Victims were allegedly pressured into unpaid labor and sexual acts with clients or investors The court ordered $12 million in forfeiture and nearly $900,000 in restitution to victims The case followed a five-week federal trial in 2025 If you want to read more: DOJ sentencing announcement Guardian coverage of the case Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2615-alexa

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) sits down with sex therapist and author Ian Kerner to break down what’s really going on in your sex life, starting with one simple question: “So tell me about the last time you had sex.” From there, they unpack the patterns most couples fall into and why sex often becomes routine, disconnected, or unsatisfying over time. This episode dives into the hidden dynamics behind desire, communication, and intimacy and how to actually fix them. They cover: sex scripts and why most people follow the same predictable pattern spontaneous vs responsive desire and why mismatched libidos happen why initiation often fails (and creates rejection cycles) obligation sex vs genuinely wanting it the role of foreplay, arousal, and why rushing to penetration backfires the orgasm gap and importance of clitoral stimulation why couples stop prioritizing sex in long-term relationships communication struggles and how to actually say what you want turning complaints into clear desires building anticipation, tension, and erotic connection practical tools like the “willingness window” how to create better sex through intention, not just chemistry