I Wish You Could Hear This

Rebuilding trust after infidelity—or any serious betrayal—can feel impossible. How do you begin trusting someone again when that trust has been completely shattered? In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff sit down with longtime friends Mark and Jill Savage, authors, speakers, and marriage coaches who know this journey firsthand. They share the story of the affair that nearly ended their marriage, the moment everything began to change, and the long process of rebuilding what had been broken. Mark and Jill explain why trust isn't restored with one apology or promise to change. Instead, it comes back through consistent changed behavior over time —what they describe as rebuilding trust "one tablespoon at a time." They share practical examples of what honesty, transparency, accountability, and compassion looked like in their own recovery, as well as the role faith, humility, and grief played in their healing. For anyone facing infidelity or another serious breach of trust, this conversation offers practical steps for moving forward—and hope that even when a marriage feels beyond repair, the story may not be over yet. This Episode's Key Topics Mark and Jill Savage's personal story of infidelity and recovery The turning point that began the healing of their marriage Why rebuilding trust requires consistent changed behavior over time The "Trust Bathtub" and rebuilding trust one tablespoon at a time The importance of honesty, transparency, and proactive accountability Taking responsibility for betrayal without shifting blame The role of grief, humility, and faith in the healing process Hope for couples who feel like their marriage may be beyond repair Resources Mark and Jill Savage: markandjill.org No More Perfect Podcast: podcast.nomoreperfect.com Free Rebuilding Trust Guide: rebuildingtrust.us Connect with Mark and Jill Instagram: @jillsavage.author Facebook: @jillsavage.author Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

What if love isn’t primarily something you feel—or something you have to wait for—but something you can choose? In this episode of I Wish You Could Hear This , Shaunti and Jeff sit down with pastor, author, and Bible teacher Chip Ingram to talk about his book I Choose Love and a radically practical way to understand biblical love. Chip explains the difference between the feelings we associate with love and the agape love modeled by Jesus: a willful, sacrificial choice to put another person’s needs ahead of our own. And that matters whether we’re dealing with tension in a marriage, a difficult family relationship, division in the church, or someone whose views are completely different from ours. Chip also gets personal, sharing how this understanding of love helped transform a deeply difficult season in his own marriage. The breakthrough came when he stopped focusing on how his wife needed to change and started asking what he could do differently. As Chip puts it, you can’t control another person—but you can change your part of the relationship. You’ll also hear why loving action sometimes has to come before loving feelings, why humility and servanthood are so important, and three practical ways to become a more loving person: declare war on selfishness, attack the pride underneath it, and intentionally practice humility by putting others’ needs ahead of your own. In this episode: Why biblical love is much more than a feeling The difference between agape love and romantic, friendship, and family love What Philippians 2 teaches us about loving like Jesus Why waiting until you feel loving can keep you stuck How choosing obedience can begin changing our hearts What Chip learned during a painful season in his own marriage Why you can’t control another person—but you can change your part of the relationship How selfishness and pride undermine love Three practical choices that can help us become more loving How Christians can pursue love and unity in a deeply divided culture Why the mindset “I am second” can change the way we approach everyday relationships Resources mentioned: Book: I Choose Love by Chip Ingram Living on the Edge: livingontheedge.org Also mentioned: Good to Great in God’s Eyes by Chip Ingram Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Boys today are growing up surrounded by confusing messages about masculinity and what it means to be a man. So how can parents help their sons develop a healthy, confident understanding of who God created them to be? Shaunti and Jeff talk with Molly DeFrank, mom of six and author of Mothering Boys: 8 Things Your Son Needs to Hear from You Before He Turns 10 . Together, they explore the powerful role parents—and especially moms—play in shaping a boy’s identity, character, confidence, and understanding of masculinity. You’ll hear practical ways to speak life into your son, recognize the unique strengths God has given him, and help him grow into a godly man of courage and character. Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Feeling overwhelmed by motherhood? Wondering how to prioritize your faith when you're barely keeping up with everyday life? If you've ever ended the day feeling guilty because you didn't have time to read your Bible, pray, or spend quiet time with God, you're not alone. In this episode of I Wish You Could Hear This , Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with author, speaker, and Equipping Godly Women founder Brittany Ann to talk honestly about the challenges young Christian moms face. Together, they explore how to grow closer to God without adding more pressure to an already full life. Brittany shares her own journey of balancing marriage, motherhood, ministry, and faith, along with practical encouragement for finding God's peace—even in the middle of exhaustion and chaos. In This Episode You'll Learn: Why so many Christian moms struggle with guilt over their spiritual lives How to prioritize your relationship with God when life feels overwhelming Practical ways to spend meaningful time with God—even if you only have a few minutes The difference between striving for perfection and pursuing faithfulness How to let go of unrealistic expectations and embrace God's grace Encouragement for moms who feel spiritually dry or discouraged Simple habits that can help you stay connected to God during busy seasons Whether you're raising toddlers, homeschooling, juggling work and family, or simply trying to catch your breath, this conversation offers biblical encouragement and practical hope for this season of life. Meet Our Guest Brittany Ann is an author, speaker, podcast host, and the founder of Equipping Godly Women , a ministry dedicated to encouraging Christian women with practical, biblical wisdom for everyday life. Since launching the ministry in 2014, Brittany has reached millions of women through articles, Bible studies, books, and online resources. She and her husband are raising four children together. Resources Mentioned Fall in Love with God's Word by Brittany Ann https://a.co/d/000kPB4D https://equippinggodlywomen.com/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: Boys and men are struggling—but this isn't a reason to lose hope. In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff unpack what's happening in today's culture, why so many boys and young men are falling behind, and the simple, powerful ways each of us can make a difference. Whether you're a parent, grandparent, mentor, teacher, or friend, you'll come away with practical encouragement and renewed hope for the boys and men you love. Resources and Links: Nancy Pearcy “The Toxic War on Masculinity” https://a.co/d/05CJjqrE Hannah Rosin, The End of Men essay in The Atlantic https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/07/the-end-of-men/308135/ “If We Were Ants” short film https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FX23DMyzvHE Pew Research -Public Views on Men and Masculinity https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2024/10/17/public-views-on-men-and-masculinity/ APA Guidelines on practice with boys and men https://www.apa.org/about/policy/boys-men-practice-guidelines.pdf Data tables: Reading scores of 4th, 8th and 12th grade students – see Figure 5, 6, 7 https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/indicator/cnb/reading-performance College enrollment of men v women https://nces.ed.gov/programs/coe/pdf/2024/cpb_508c.pdf https://nces.ed.gov/programs/digest/d22/tables/dt22_303.10.asp Bureau of Labor Statistics about men and women in the workforce: https://www.bls.gov/charts/employment-situation/civilian-labor-force-participation-rate.htm Mortality data: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db456.htm https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FX23DMyzvHE Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with author, counselor, and father-daughter relationship expert Michelle Watson Canfield to explore one of the most challenging seasons of parenting: connecting with adolescent daughters. Many dads feel uncertain about how to respond when their daughters become more emotional, pull away, or seem resistant to their efforts. Michelle shares a powerful insight she has observed through years of counseling: many men would rather do nothing than risk doing it wrong—but when it comes to fathering daughters, stepping back often creates more distance. Together, Shaunti, Jeff, and Michelle unpack why dads often feel sidelined during the teenage years, how mothers can become caught in the middle, and practical ways fathers can stay engaged even when conversations feel awkward or difficult. You’ll learn: Why many dads instinctively pull back—and why that can be harmful How to stay calm and grounded when emotions run high Practical ways to pursue your daughter with intention and consistency Why your presence matters more than your perfection How to build trust and connection during the adolescent years If you've ever felt unsure how to connect with your daughter—or worried that you're getting it wrong—this conversation will equip and encourage you to keep showing up. Because your daughter doesn't need a perfect dad. She needs an engaged one. Links and Resources: Website: drmichellewatson.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/drmichellewatson Instagram: michellejwatson and thedadwhispererpodcast Twitter: @mwatsonphd LinkedIn: Dr. Michelle Watson Canfield The Dad Whisperer Podcast: Apple Podcasts + Spotify YouTube: @thedadwhisperer Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

SUMMARY: What happens when a marriage starts drifting apart — and one or both spouses wonder if it’s even possible to reconnect? In this honest and hope-filled conversation, and sit down with author, speaker, and podcast host to talk about the quiet disconnection many couples experience and the practical ways healing can begin — even when things feel broken. Drawing from Lindsey’s personal story and her new book Don’t Burn Down the House , this episode explores: Why many marriages slowly drift into “roommate mode” What often causes emotional disconnection beneath the surface How resentment and hopelessness quietly build Why change can begin even if only one spouse is willing The small shifts that can create major transformation How to prioritize your marriage without losing yourself What rebuilding trust and connection really looks like If you’ve ever felt discouraged, lonely, unseen, or unsure whether your marriage can recover, this conversation offers practical wisdom and genuine hope. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Book: Don't Burn Your Own House Down: Prioritizing Your Marriage, Your Spouse, and Yourself for a Deeper Connection: Maestas, Lindsey: 9780310369479: Amazon.com: Books Website: HOME - Sparrows + Lily Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: In this powerful episode of I Wish You Could Hear This , Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with author, speaker, and ministry leader Willow Weston to explore what it means to truly heal from hurt instead of hiding from it. Together, they unpack how unresolved pain can surface in anxiety, broken relationships, unforgiveness, and emotional exhaustion—and why healing begins when we stop running from our wounds and bring them honestly before God. Willow shares her personal story, the heart behind her ministry Collide , and insights from her new book about embracing pain as part of the pathway to restoration and deeper connection. This conversation offers encouragement for anyone carrying hidden hurt, walking through disappointment, or longing to experience emotional and spiritual healing. You’ll hear: Why unprocessed pain often “comes out sideways” How honesty and vulnerability open the door to healing The role faith and community play in restoration Encouragement for those feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or emotionally exhausted Hope for healing not only for ourselves, but also for the people we love If you’ve ever wondered whether real healing is possible, this episode is a reminder that God meets us in our pain—and that hope and restoration are closer than we think. Links and Resources: Book: Collide Website: https://wecollide.net/staff/willow-weston/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

SUMMARY: In this episode of I Wish You Could Hear This , Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with licensed professional counselor and bestselling author Debra Fileta for an honest and insightful conversation about the relationship blind spots many of us don’t realize we have. Together, they explore how emotional patterns, past wounds, and unrecognized habits can quietly shape the way we connect with others. Debra shares practical wisdom on how to grow in self-awareness, strengthen communication, and take ownership of the ways we impact the people we love. Whether you’re dating, married, leading others, or simply wanting healthier relationships, this episode offers hope-filled tools to help you break unhealthy cycles and build deeper connection. If you’ve ever wondered why relationships can feel harder than they should—or how to become a healthier version of yourself—this conversation is for you. LINKS AND RESOURCES: Book: People Skills: Your Relationships Are Only as Strong as Your Skills Website: Debra Fileta | Best Selling Author, Speaker, Psychotherapist, and Podcaster! The Kindness Challenge Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: In Part 2 of this important conversation on the modern dating recession, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn continue unpacking new research from the Institute for Family Studies on why so many marriage-minded singles are struggling to date—and what can actually help. With 70% of surveyed singles saying they want meaningful relationships but aren’t dating, the challenge is real—but not hopeless. Shaunti and Jeff revisit the key barriers discussed in Part 1 and dive into additional reasons dating feels harder today, from fear and discouragement to unclear expectations and social disconnection. Most importantly, they offer practical, research-based encouragement for singles who desire marriage, as well as parents and loved ones who want to support them. If you or someone you care about feels stuck in today’s dating landscape, this episode offers fresh insight, empathy, and a hopeful path forward toward genuine connection. Resources: Report on “The Dating Recession”. https://ifstudies.org/report-brief/state-of-our-unions-2026-the-dating-recession IFS article about young men. See point 2 for “Most unmarried young men want to marry” https://ifstudies.org/blog/young-men-are-not-checked-out-their-hopes-are-being-frustrated For Women Only link . For Men Only link Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn unpack the growing “dating recession” impacting today’s young adults. Why are so many singles ages 22 to 35 dating less or not at all? They explore the emotional, social, and cultural factors behind the trend, from fear and discouragement to a lack of confidence and connection. With practical insights and real hope, Shaunti and Jeff discuss the relationship skills that matter most, why community support is essential, and how singles can navigate today’s dating landscape with greater clarity and confidence. Resources: Report on “The Dating Recession”. https://ifstudies.org/report-brief/state-of-our-unions-2026-the-dating-recession IFS article about young men. See point 2 for “Most unmarried young men want to marry” https://ifstudies.org/blog/young-men-are-not-checked-out-their-hopes-are-being-frustrated For Women Only For Men Only link Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: In this episode, Shaunti Feldhahn sits down with author Laurie Davies to unpack the powerful concept behind the book Emotional Hoarding: Letting Go of the Stuff That Keeps You Stuck . Together, they explore how holding onto hard emotions costs us. Emotional 'hoarding’ limits how we love, it keeps us stuck in regret, grudges, and shame—and, most importantly, it creates a disconnect between us and the freedom God wants us to walk in. Together, Shaunti and Laurie distinguish between emotional “baggage” and the deeper patterns of emotional hoarding, highlighting signs that you might be hoarding hard emotions, and why honest self-examination is essential to breaking free. The conversation dives into emotions such as worry, worthlessness, regret, anger, and bitterness—focusing on how scripture offers a clear path to freedom. With worry, for example, Shaunti and Laurie discuss how renewing our thinking, grounded in principles from Philippians 4:8, can close the worry loop and restore peace. As Shaunti observed in her foreword to the book: “You will never think about your inner emotional life the same way again.” Tune in to this episode for a hope-filled path for stepping into greater emotional and relational freedom. Links: lauriedavies.com Emotional Hoarding on Amazon Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: Parents naturally want to protect their kids from disappointment and failure—but sometimes our help can actually get in the way of their growth. In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff talk about the growing trend of “snowplow parenting,” where parents try to clear every obstacle out of their child’s path. Through stories, research insights, and practical wisdom, they explore how well-meaning parents can unintentionally prevent their kids from learning resilience and responsibility. You’ll hear why allowing natural consequences can actually be a gift—and how to support your kids without removing every challenge in front of them. For Parents Only https://shaunti.com/2024/05/how-to-stop-being-a-snowplow-parent-part-1/ https://shaunti.com/2024/05/how-to-stop-being-a-snowplow-parent-part-2/ https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/16/style/snowplow-parenting-scandal.html Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary : In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn unpack one of the most overlooked sources of conflict in marriage: the very different ways men and women process thoughts and emotions. Drawing on two decades of research, they explore why many women experience ongoing “open windows,” lingering worries or mental tabs that are hard to close and why many men may not even realize those windows are still open. With practical insight and empathy for both sides, Shaunti and Jeff explain the brain-based and physiological differences that shape how we handle stress and disagreement. Most importantly, they offer simple, powerful ways spouses can respond in moments of tension, turning misunderstanding into connection. If you’ve ever felt like you and your spouse were missing each other emotionally, this conversation will give you fresh clarity and practical tools to build deeper understanding. Resources : Gur, R. C., & Gur, R. E. (2017). Complementarity of sex differences in brain and behavior: From laterality to multimodal neuroimaging. Journal of Neuroscience Research, 95 (1), 189–199. https://doi.org/10.1002/jnr.2383 FOR MEN ONLY FOR WOMEN ONLY Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: What are young couples really wondering about as they step into engagement and marriage? In this special and deeply personal episode, Shaunti and Jeff sit down with their daughter Morgen and her fiancé Ben—just weeks before their wedding—to talk candidly about readiness, trust, faith, conflict, finances, sex, and what it really means to commit for life. Drawing from both lived experience and decades of research, this conversation blends heart, humor, and practical wisdom for engaged couples—and for parents walking alongside them. Resources: The Secrets of Sex and Marriage The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary In this second part of our powerful two-part series, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn continue their heartfelt conversation with Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith, diving even deeper into the healing journey after sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. Building on the foundation of honesty and vulnerability discussed in Part 1, this episode unpacks what it takes to truly rebuild trust and intimacy in a relationship that’s been deeply wounded. The Raabsmiths offer practical, grace-filled guidance for couples, emphasizing the importance of structured healing, safe community, and sustained emotional connection. You’ll hear how couples can move forward, not just surviving, but genuinely thriving through intentional steps, compassionate support, and the redemptive work of God. This is a vital conversation for anyone longing to understand the path to restoration and hope. If you missed Part 1, be sure to go back and start there for the full picture of this profound dialogue. Resources: https://raabsmithteam.com/free Building True Intimacy https://www.amazon.com/Building-True-Intimacy-Creating-Connection/dp/B0CHCLTDZJ/?tag=shaunticom-20 Secrets of Sex and Marriage book For referral resources: secretsofsexandmarriage.com Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary This episode is part one of a two-part conversation that we simply couldn’t keep to one week. !t’s that powerful! Dr. Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith to tackle one of the most painful but crucial topics in relationships: sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. With deep empathy and rich insight, the Raabsmiths, a couple who are both trained professionals and seasoned by personal experience, share the emotional and relational toll of betrayal and the courageous journey toward healing. They explore the critical roles of honesty, vulnerability, and structured support in recovery, highlighting how both partners contribute to rebuilding trust and intimacy. You'll hear practical, research-backed strategies for couples, as well as how the church can be a safe and redemptive place for those walking this road. Don’t miss this compelling conversation, and be sure to come back next week for Part 2, where we go even deeper into the healing process and the hopeful road forward. Resources: https://raabsmithteam.com/free Building True Intimacy Secrets of Sex and Marriage book For referral resources: secretsofsexandmarriage.com Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: In this insightful episode Jeff and Shaunti, along with Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott, delve into the deeper layers of love languages, unpacking not only the five primary categories but also the nuanced dialects within each one. With warmth and expertise, they explore how the concept of the “love tank”—our emotional reservoir—impacts relationships and why empathy is the key to truly speaking each other's language. The conversation highlights practical tools like the Five Love Languages Assessment and the “My Heart Chart,” offering listeners accessible ways to foster connection. Through real-life stories and actionable guidance, the Parrotts empower couples to bridge communication gaps and build lasting intimacy—one intentional act of love at a time. Links and Resources https://www.amazon.com/Love-Language-That-Matters-Most/dp/0802438903/?tag=shaunticom-20 For assessments and more details: www.5lovelanguages.com https://www.myheartchart.com/ LesAndLeslie.com Social media- IG: @Lesandleslie; X: @LesParrott; Facebook: @Lesandleslieparrott Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary : In this insightful episode, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn sit down with Dr. Gary Chapman, renowned author of The Five Love Languages and The Five Languages of Apology . Together, they explore how understanding both love and apology languages can radically improve relationships. Dr. Chapman unpacks the five core ways people express and receive love—and explains how offering sincere, well-matched apologies can be just as vital to healing and connection. The conversation highlights the power of empathy, emotional communication, and forgiveness in maintaining strong, healthy relationships. Whether you're married, dating, or simply want to love others well, this episode offers powerful tools to deepen your relational bonds. Links and Resources : www.5lovelanguages.com The Five Languages of Apology Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Summary: In this episode, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn share their personal journey with MediShare, a healthcare sharing ministry, as they navigate rising medical costs and their own health challenges. They welcome Dr. Ian Day, Chief Medical Officer at MediShare, to unpack how the program works, its biblical roots, and the powerful sense of community that distinguishes it from traditional insurance. Together, they explore how MediShare integrates emotional and spiritual support into healthcare, emphasizing the role of prayer and the holistic vision of biblical wellness—caring for body, mind, and soul. Links and Resources: About CCM | Christian Care Ministry Medishare.com/serve Or text “serve” to 70246 Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .