Bangers & Classics

It's the Bangers & Classics Christmas podcast, featuring some sparkling (it says here – not that anyone will believe it) chat about films, film music, and cars. There's also news about the quiz. News which, it has to be said, proved to be wrong, thereby forcing the lads to step away from the delights of the B&C Christmas Party and make a last-minute correction. We'll be back in 2023 if James and David have recovered from the party by then. Merry Christmas.

Reports of our demise have been greatly exaggerated (by us, it has to be said), yet here we are. And to mark our return it gives us great pleasure (it says here) to present the Bangers & Classics Quiz. The rules are simple. There are twenty questions (unless we've contrived to get the numbers wrong, always a distinct possibility). Your job is to answer them and thereafter send your answers by Direct Message to the Bangers & Classics twitter account, @BangersClassics. We're counting on you to do this, as we're stumped by quite a few of the questions and need all the help we can get. If you get the outright highest score then you win a prize and we'll also give a prize to a runner-up (selected by lucky dip if there's no outright runner-up). In the event that more than one person achieves the highest score then we'll select two prize-winners by lucky dip. Each prize winner can choose between either a Bangers & Classics mug OR any one of the currently available books written by James or David. You've got until midnight on 7th December, 2022, to submit your entry. Prize-winners will be notified by Direct Message on 8th December. The judges's decision is final etc. Good luck.

After their close shave on Halloween (not literally, to James's great relief), the intrepid (it says here) duo offer their unique take on Guy Fawkes' Night. But will this episode sparkle or just be a bit of a damp squib? Contains an excerpt from: 'After the Rain' by Keys of Moon (https://soundcloud.com/keysofmoon), used under under a Creative Commons 4.0 licence (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) and promoted by https://chosic.com/free-music/all/

It's Halloween and the B&C crew are on the road, doing their utmost to avoid witches, warlocks, ghouls, ghosts, and vampires. But it's not just politicians whom they must flee: enraged owners clubs, jealous admirers of Hammer Horror actresses, and EV advocates all want their pound (454 grammes for those working in metric) of flesh too. Undaunted, our dynamic (it says here) duo's journey takes them to dark places where people speak in hushed tones of the uncanny, the unfeasible, and the impossible. Will they make it to their journey's end or will they, in the words of Rabbie Burns, be caught by warlocks in the mirk by Alloway's auld haunted kirk?

As you huddle round the fire, clinging to its warmth and light for comfort as the veil between this world and the one beyond becomes ever more fragile, you'll be glad to know that the daring B&C duo have ventured forth into the darkness, braving all that lurks in the shadows for your entertainment. They will return (we hope) on Halloween itself.

Finding themselves in 1975, David having legged it from 1972 after being made an offer he couldn't refuse and James having been, er, coaxed away from Hammer Horror actresses, the duo dive into the year's cars, music and films. Their verdict: we're gonna need a bigger podcast.

In this, the 83rd episode of Bangers & Classics, James and David take a wild on the wild side...in 1972. Whilst doing their best to avoid a bloke with big teeth and a cape (no, not the one who wants his dishwasher back...), they tackle the thorny question that's long been on everyone's lips (it says here): is the Fiat 126 a Banger or a Classic. There's controversy, too, as David disses a film regarded by many people as a classic as well as having a pop at one of Britain's best-loved cars. And to cap a typically erratic appearance on the pod, he manages to enter a car from the wrong decade in the challenge. James, meantime, gets on his bike in search of a certain actress. We'll leave it to you to work out which one. We're sure he'll be fine as long as he keeps clear of disused churches and Triumph Stags.

In this Federal bumper-sized edition of Bangers & Classics, James and David travel back to 1982 – a year about which David has mixed feelings. [We're not saying it concerns a girl, but...it concerns a girl.] Be that as it may, this week's choice of car to face the Banger or Classic inquisitors proves somewhat divisive. The challenge throws up (not literally – well, we hope not) a real curio, though perhaps it's better left in the 'lost, thank goodness' file. There's also much chat about music and films, the latter of which includes a surprising revelation. What is it? Well, you'll have to listen to find out...

Returning after a much lauded two week break, James and David travel back to 1960. They'd have stayed there too but for an incident involving James's beard, a Routemaster bus, and David's attempt to persuade a young Geoff Hurst that he wasn't really cut out to be a footballer... Elsewhere, an unusual subject is hauled into the Bangers & Classics courtroom, there's a challenge, and much chat about films and music.

In this, the 80th episode of Bangers & Classics, James and David zip back to 1978, home of some good music and great films. Whilst there, and in between bouts of James strutting his funky stuff (it says here) on the dancefloor, they decide if the Fiat Ritmo has sufficiently street cred (or should that be Strada cred?) to be considered a classic. There's also a challenge, one which sees James attempt to claim victory on a technicality, and the inaugural motor show at the NEC gets a visit. Which leaves just one burning question: did they pay on the door or sneak in through the fire exit?

We have come here to podcast and chew bubblegum, and we're all out of bubblegum... Yup, it's 1988, and we're here to decide if it's a banger or a classic. Along the way, the 3rd generation Vauxhall Cavalier faces the jury, we search for a boring car, and James attends a Christmas Party at Nakatomi Plaza in his new vest.

In this episode the boys reluctantly trudge back to the year 2000, a year filled with great, er, um, ah, let me think about that one. Hmmm. More thinking time required...

Episode 77 sees our resident time-travelling mavericks return to 1986. Whilst there, they argue about the merits of a John Carpenter film, give the Volvo 480 the once over, and seek out interesting coupes to buy. Also, James pretends never to have heard one of finest songs of the 1980s but shows great interest in (it says here) either costume jewellery or an all-girl band.

The rumour: Bangers & Classics has a new format The official comment (by B&C spokesgeezer Harry Callahan) : "Podcasts? They're for assholes..."

Exhausted by their previous lack of effort, the lads nonetheless draw deep from their energy wells (who writes this stuff?) to bring you the 75th episode of Bangers & Classics - an all expense spared extravaganza that's an avatar for all that this podcast stands for (it says here). And that, we suppose, is an appropriate time to tell you that next week's episode will adopt a new format. Unless, of course, we change our minds.

In spite of having to work with an idiot, James has dipped deep into his reserves of Zen and decided not to storm off in huff... Consequently, he and the aforementioned idiot return with more half-baked opinions, dubious statistics, and controversial conclusions. In this week's episode, the Bangers & Classics jury decides whether the Sierra Sapphire is a diamond in the rough...or just rough; tribute is paid to Paddy Hopkirk; James deliberately misunderstands the task set by this week's challenge; and the last pre-Fiat Alfa finds itself in the DangerZone.

Having extended their world record for shambolic podcasting to 72 episodes, James and David return with yet another low-fi episode. Having clashed over the Golf GTI, the duo attempt to patch things up by buying a motorhome for the Bangers & Classics summer tour. But will this feeble attempt at reconciliation work, or is it curtains for B&C? Elsewhere, David rambles on about a cult 1980s film, the Fiat 127 finds itself in the DangerZone, and Reliant is the subject of a typically poorly researched potted history.

After the shambles of the previous 71 episodes, James and David are back with a whole new approach, as evidenced by this episode's hard-hitting topics, which may include some, all or none of the following: Why don't manufacturers fit toasters to cars? Who invented liquid soap, and why? Did David really suggest that his local council replace rubbish skips with Mazda MX-5s? Elsewhere, we select an official nautical anthem for Bangers & Classics, talk about some abandoned ideas, issue a public information bulletin, buy a ridiculously opulent car, and try to drum up some enthusiasm for the FSO Polonez. Oh, and the Banger or Classic jury decides whether or not the Rover 200 BRM is a gas.

In this episode of Bangers & Classics, the EV is launched, James falls in love with a Goddess, David proves that he has an 8-track mind, the Nissan Micra is summoned from Toyland to the Banger or Classic courtroom, the Simca 1100 takes the highway to the Danger Zone, and David finds a car with a John Carpenter reference.

In this, the 70th episode of Bangers and Classics, David responds in typical fashion to a grumble about the running time of episode 69, the Suzuki Vitara drives across hills, moors and streams to appear before the Banger or Classic jury, the lads present their ideas for alternative forms of energy before heading back to the gritty streets of the Isle of Dogs circa 1985. And to top off a fuller podcast (Mr. Corrugated, please note) than episode 69, they each scour the classifieds for the ugliest car they can find. They'll grow up one day. Possibly... [Sorry about the sound quality. Again. We're moving to another provider with immediate effect.]