Rebuilding Us: Marriage Podcast

Have you ever tried to explain how you feel, only to walk away feeling even more misunderstood? In marriage, this can be very frustrating. A simple conversation turns into defensiveness, confusion, or conflict. In this episode, I’m sharing practical ways to communicate what you’re really feeling so your partner has a better chance of hearing your heart. I’ll walk you through how to express yourself with more clarity, stay grounded during difficult conversations, and avoid some of the common communication habits that create unnecessary tension. If you’re tired of conversations going sideways and want to feel more heard, understood, and connected in your relationship, this episode is for you. Key Takeaways: How to express your feelings without putting your partner on the defensive Why clarity matters when communicating what you need A funny story of how this works with Shaun and me in real time Common mistakes that cause your message to get misunderstood How to stay grounded when emotions are running high Ways to create more connection during difficult conversations Resources Mentioned in This Episode: Get your FREE Heart to Heart Conversation Starters here . Start my From Conflict to Connection course today and be on track to better communication immediately! Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

I'm discussing six signs of spiritual abuse in marriage and how to recognize the difference between biblical spiritual leadership and toxic leadership. I explain why healthy leadership invites collaboration, tolerates disagreement, and never uses Scripture, submission, or God to control a spouse. I also talk about spiritual manipulation, maintaining personal discernment, forgiveness versus reconciliation, and why forgiveness does not require continued access to harm you. Finally, I share practical steps for responding to abuse, including telling the truth to someone trustworthy, stopping the minimization of harmful patterns, documenting what is happening, prioritizing safety, and seeking qualified support before attempting to rebuild the marriage. Key Takeaways: Healthy leadership invites collaboration. “Let’s pray about this” creates room for discernment and discussion. “I’m in charge, so this is what we’re doing” demands control. Biblical submission does not require surrendering discernment. A wife remains morally responsible, spiritually discerning, and able to recognize when something is wrong. Submission to God comes before submission to another person. Forgiveness does not require continued access to harm you. Reconciliation requires safety and repentance. A person can forgive while setting boundaries, filing a police report, or seeking a restraining order. A marriage should not be preserved at the expense of someone’s safety. When abuse is active, the first steps are safety, clear boundaries, trustworthy support, documentation, and qualified help, not immediate marriage counseling. Remember, healthy spiritual leadership lays down personal preferences and agendas for the good of the people being led. It does not require someone else to disappear or become small. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Healing after betrayal is possible, but it requires intentional work. Learn more about the step-by-step course created to help couples process pain, rebuild trust, and reconnect at danache.com/infidelityintensive Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

My hubby, Shaun, joins me in this special episode to discuss the Netflix docuseries Death of the Pastor’s Wife and the difficult questions it raises about abuse of power, spiritual manipulation, accountability, submission, and marriage. This conversation goes beyond the story itself. Shaun and I explore how churches can create healthier accountability structures, why power differentials matter, what you should do when you recognize abuse, and what partnership in marriage can look like without control or coercion. If you’re married, serving in leadership, part of a church community, or reexamining your own faith and relationships, this episode offers an honest conversation about discernment, responsibility, and healing. Key Takeaways: Why every church leader needs accountability How spiritual manipulation can distort Scripture The difference between biblical submission and control Why victims shouldn’t be blamed for someone else’s abuse of power How Shaun and I approach marriage as a partnership Why church members have a responsibility to speak up when something feels wrong A prayer for marriages, church leaders, victims of abuse, and Mica Miller's family If you're being abused by a spouse or partner, seek legal and professional help. Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800.799.SAFE (7233). Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Talking to your spouse about your marriage can become so constant that the relationship starts feeling like a project instead of a partnership. While communication is important, there are other ways to build connection...six ways in fact, that work better than repeated conversations. Listen in as I share these practical marriage tips to help deepen your connection and shift you toward regulation, curiosity, appreciation, consistent action, and ordinary moments of togetherness. Key Takeaways: How your marriage problems can become the only subject of the relationship, turning dates, car rides, and quiet moments into another relationship evaluation Why trying to resolve conflict while emotionally flooded turns spouses into attorneys actually arguing their case How a temporary pause can protect your marriage What to do when criticism becomes the dominant atmosphere in your marriage Why your spouse has seemingly "stopped trying" The 80/20 marriage rule that will enhance your friendship, enjoyment, and connection Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Get your free Heart-to-Heart Conversation Starters here . Rebuilding your marriage after infidelity? Let Infidelity Intensive do the heavy lifting for you. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

What do you do when you want to work on the marriage... but your spouse doesn't? Maybe you've suggested marriage coaching or counseling. You've sent the podcast episode. You've bought the book. You've tried to start the conversations. You've prayed for change. And your spouse seems uninterested, unwilling, or just plain tired of talking about the marriage. That can be an incredibly frustrating and lonely place to be. But here's the truth I want you to hear in this episode: Your spouse's unwillingness to work on the marriage doesn't mean there's no work you can do. And it doesn't mean your only options are to nag them into participating or sit around waiting for them to change. In this episode, we're talking about what it looks like to take responsibility for your side of the relationship without trying to carry the entire marriage by yourself. We'll talk about the temptation to make your spouse the project, why pressure rarely produces genuine change, and how focusing on your own growth can begin to shift the dynamic in your relationship. In This Episode, You'll Learn: What to do when you're the only one who seems interested in improving the marriage The difference between taking responsibility and taking all the responsibility What you can control when so much feels outside of your control How to develop stamina for the long game Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Have you dealt with rejection or the feeling of being forgotten or neglected? When the people closest to you treat you like you're invisible or unimportant, it can trigger all sorts of emotions and insecurities. In today's podcast episode, I'm sharing a story of a woman who gave and gave, but her best still wasn't good enough. She was literally discarded like yesterday's news. But in that pain, she found God. Not just a God she'd heard about, but one she encountered for herself. Join me as I share how God sees you, supports you, and stays with you...even when everyone else walks away. This inspirational podcast episode will bless your marriage, your friendships, your family relationships, and your whole life. Key Takeaways: The Power of God's Names: El Roi: The God Who Sees Me Hagar, from Genesis 16, is the first person in Scripture to give God a name. Through Hagar’s experience, we see how God sees us in our struggles, loneliness, and pain. El Shaddai: The All-Sufficient One No matter what we feel we lack—whether in life or in marriage—God is more than enough and provides everything we need. Jehovah Shalom: The Lord is Peace Invoking God’s shalom means declaring His full, restorative peace over our homes and relationships. Emmanuel: God With Us God is not distant; He is present in every season, moment, and even in conflict, offering comfort and companionship. Resources Mentioned in this Episode Download my FREE "Speak Life Affirmations" audio and combat every negative thought with the truth of God's word. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Let’s be honest—just because we grew up and got married doesn’t mean we left our triggers at the playground. Sometimes marriage can feel like an endless game of emotional Whac-A-Mole. In today’s episode, I’m unpacking the hidden childhood triggers that sneak into our marriages, those moments when a look or a phrase sends us spiraling back—defenses up, ready to fight, flee, or freeze. But surely there's a better way. Here’s what we dig into: Unpacking Childhood Baggage We talk about why seemingly harmless comments from our spouse can unleash a flood of old wounds, and how those reactions aren’t just “sensitivity”—they’re well-worn ruts of our childhood stories. Scarcity Mindset in Marriage What happens when our knee-jerk belief is that there’s “not enough”—not enough love, attention, or security? I’ll confess the ways scarcity thinking creeps into my own marriage, and the choices I made, both emotional and practical, have started shifting our connection. Faith and the Hard Work of Healing Yep, we’re going there. I unpack where faith gets tangled up with those painful places—and why it matters. We talk about inviting God into the ugly-beautiful mess, not just the Instagrammable moments, and why radical honesty is sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do. Steps Toward Healing—Without Pretending It’s Easy This isn’t about quick fixes or pretending your marriage is something it’s not. We’ll get real about weariness. About losing hope. About showing up anyway and trying one more time. Because that’s where real change starts: not with grand gestures, but with brave, small choices over time. Links & Resources: Take my free quiz: How Connected a Partner Are You? Get my new book: Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples Recommended episode: “Unpacking Triggers, Strongholds, & Inner Healing - with Frank Meadows” Support the Show: Your giving makes a difference! Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

In part two of this conversation on opposite sex friendships in marriage, marriage coach Sylvia Chipman and I reflect on how emotional affairs rarely begin with the intention to betray a spouse. They often develop gradually through personal conversations, frequent communication, shared experiences, and the comforting feeling of being deeply understood. A person may genuinely believe, “We’re just friends,” while unintentionally building a level of closeness that belongs within the marriage. This is why boundaries are crucial for protecting not only your marriage but also your other friendship. Key Takeaways: How to respond when your spouse expresses discomfort. Is preserving the friendship worth damaging your partner’s peace or weakening trust in your marriage? How humility tied the cords of trust and security in your marriage How your history, vulnerabilities, and level of trust shape the boundaries your marriage needs Specific boundaries you may want to employ in your relationships This episode isn’t about living suspiciously or refusing to interact with the opposite sex. It’s about choosing wisdom. Healthy friendships require transparency, appropriate communication, and boundaries both spouses understand and respect. Ultimately, there may not be one rule that fits every couple. The goal is not to prove that you can handle a friendship—it is to protect the intimacy, safety, and trust you are building with your spouse. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Think your relationship may be in danger of an affair? Take my confidential "Affair Quiz" here. Learn more about Sylvia's marriage coaching here. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

If you're married, can men and women really be just friends? It’s a question as old as time, sparking heated debates at dinner tables, in church lobbies, and—of course—in marriages. Today's episode is a sweet repeat, where I sat down with my good friend and fellow marriage coach, Sylvia Chipman, to unpack this tricky territory: Can you maintain healthy, platonic friendships with the opposite sex after you’re married? Or is it just a slippery slope? Sylvia and I get real and raw about our own experiences—some wins, some mistakes, and lots of lessons learned in hopes that you'll guard your marriages with intention. Key Takeaways: The emotional bonds that can form even if you’re not physically attracted to someone Why setting healthy boundaries is crucial How past wounds or histories of infidelity can shape your perspective on friendship with the opposite sex. We also discuss “situationships,” the slow burn of emotional affairs, and how to spot (and avoid) potential pitfalls in your friendships. You'll hear practical advice on communicating with your spouse about opposite-sex friends and how to get real with yourself so that you can be real with the true purpose of your friendships. Whether you believe it’s possible to have platonic friends in marriage or think it’s playing with fire, this episode will make you think twice about this important issue. This episode originally aired on October 10, 2023. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Want to connect better with your spouse? Learn your "connection style" by taking my partner quiz here. Looking for a quick but strategic guide in connecting with your spouse? Get my new book, Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples. Connect with Sylvia and learn about her coaching here. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Infidelity is a word that can strike deep fear and pain into the heart of any married person. Many believe that affairs “just happen,” or that only people in miserable relationships are at risk. But as I share in today's episode, even couples with good marriages, strong commitments, and sincere love for one another can find themselves blindsided by the devastation of an affair. Understanding how affairs happen—the real anatomy of an affair—is crucial to safeguarding your relationship. I draw on both my own personal experiences and the biblical story of David and Bathsheba to help unpack the key stages of an affair and, more importantly, how they can be avoided. Whether you fear an affair is brewing, are teetering on the edge yourself, or want to help protect friends and loved ones, this episode can serve as a wake-up call and a guide toward a safer, more genuine marriage. Key Takeaways from This Episode Temptation Isn’t Sin: Being tempted is not a sin. We all experience temptation, but what we do next makes all the difference. David & Bathsheba’s Story: Using the biblical account as a backdrop, learn the steps that lead to an affair. Practical Advice: Boredom and idle time can open doors to temptation. Learn what to do to curb your vulnerabilities. There’s Always a Way Out: The episode dives into 1 Corinthians 10, reassuring you that God will always provide a way of escape when we are tempted. No Affair Is Worth the Cost: No good thing comes from an affair, and the path of rebuilding, though tough, can absolutely be worth it. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Is your relationship at risk for an affair? Take my free 2-minute quiz: 👉 danache.com/affairquiz Get my new book, Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples —with a dedicated chapter on infidelity and so much more. Get your copy here! Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Are you ready to transform conflict in your marriage and cultivate a deeper partnership? I sat down with special guest David Haastrup, host of the Reconnected Marriage Partners Podcast, for his take on increasing emotional awareness/regulation and the CALM method for handling conflict. We both share honest stories from our own marriages, including how our different upbringings shaped our expectations and how teamwork and partnership are essential for Christian couples. David dives into practical strategies for emotional regulation, self-awareness, and what it really means to “catch the moment” before things get heated. We also explore why the early years of marriage can be so challenging and how his book, “A Couple’s First 10 Years,” can help you thrive when life throws curveballs—like cross-country moves, health crises, and raising young kids. If you’ve ever felt stuck in the same old conflict cycle, or want to uncover what’s really beneath surface-level arguments, you don’t want to miss this conversation. Key Takeaways: A CALM Approach to Conflict Conflict is inevitable, but chaos doesn’t have to be. David introduced his practical CALM Method for handling disagreements with empathy and intention: C atch the moment – Develop self-awareness to recognize turning points in a conflict. A llow the pause – Take a breather before responding to diffuse tension. L ower the intensity – Use gentle words and reframe your approach to prevent escalation. M ove toward understanding – Focus on truly hearing your partner, not just winning the argument. This episode is full of actionable advice and personal stories about how this framework makes a difference, even when emotions run high and the household clashes (like those endless debates over the dishes!), plus more tips on emotional regulation. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Struggling in your early years of marriage or want to support friends who are? David's new book, A Couple’s First 10 Years , might be just the read you need. Also, check out his free online webinar: “How to Stop the Argument Before It Starts" and the Reconnected Marriages Partners Podcast here. Get my Heart-to-Heart Conversation Starters —three simple prompts to help you start difficult conversations with clarity and empathy. Grab your copy here! Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

It's a topic that every married couple deals with sooner or later—conflict. If you’re married, you know that conflict comes with the territory. But there is a way to deal with it better and faster. Sometimes it shows up in the middle of family vacations, like on our recent trip to Tokyo and Guam. Sean and I found ourselves in the midst of a classic “silent treatment” scenario—cordial but emotionally iced out. Even our normally amazing vacations aren’t immune to moments like that. Conflict can give way to anger, and if we're not careful, can erode even the best of relationships. Anger in marriage takes a lot of forms. Some of us explode , others implode and just simmer with resentment. I believe that unchecked anger is dangerous, sometimes even more so when it’s hidden. That’s why I turn to scripture, specifically Ephesians 4, which famously says “do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.” For me, that means not allowing anger to control me. It doesn’t necessarily mean every single conflict needs to be solved before bed. Sometimes you need a pause, but you shouldn’t let anger fester and give the devil a foothold. Key Takeaways: The “24-hour rule” in our marriage . It was actually Shaun’s idea—why, more often than not, underneath our anger is about something deeper: like feeling unheard, disrespected, or maybe just plain tired. The power of the pause. Instead of stewing, take time to reflect on what's actually going with you. Important questions to ask yourself. What am I really feeling? What triggered me? “I” statements to bring clarity. Share your perspective, not accusations. Be honest with your spouse—even if you don’t have all the answers yet. Conflict doesn’t have to break connection. With a little honesty, reflection, and grace, it can actually bring you closer together. Resources Mentioned in This Episode: Not sure how to bring up certain conversations? Get my "Conversation Starters when in Conflict FREE guide. Go deeper with my interactive communication course: From Conflict to Connection. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Sharing your feelings can be vulnerable, especially if there is already conflict in your relationship. Too often, people choose to stuff their feelings, pretending all is well just to avoid conflict. The problem with that is that conflict doesn't usually just go away. It must be addressed. Originally aired in December, 2023, today's episode is one for the ages. I'm sharing four tips on how to honestly express yourself to your spouse or partner without deepening the disconnection gap or making things worse. After you listen, you will be equipped with four ways to communicate more clearly and confidently and seek a mutual resolution for any conflict that comes your way. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Get your FREE "Conversation Starters for Couples in Conflict" here. Check out my "From Conflict to Connection" e-course. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Marriage is a blessing...until it's not. Good marriages can be like heaven on earth, but bad marriages are like h, e, double hockey sticks. Whether your marriage is wonderful or wearisome, chances are you may be prioritizing it too much. How do you know if your marriage has become an idol in your life? That's what we're discussing in today's sweet repeat episode (originally aired on August 6, 2024). Christian marriages, especially, can fall prey to marriage becoming an idol, because it seems most churches are obsessed with singles getting married, married people making marriage work, and the like. Marriage is a good thing. But there are some dangers of making your marriage or your spouse your end-all be-all. This conversation is one we need to have more of. Listen in as I unpack how to keep your marriage first without it becoming too much of the focus of your world. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Change your language, and change your life. Download my free Speak Life Audio Affirmations here. Go deeper and listen to my sermon, "Idols in Disguise." Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Are you disappointed by someone you love? Maybe your spouse let you down, a friend broke your trust, or a relationship didn't turn out the way you hoped. The truth is, every one of us has experienced the pain of unmet expectations. In this replay episode, we're revisiting a foundational conversation about hope, because the message is just as important today as when it first aired. Disappointment has a way of settling into our hearts if we don't address it. Left unchecked, it can lead to bitterness, resentment, anger, and emotional distance in our relationships. But there is another path. In this episode, we'll explore how to stop avoiding the pain of disappointment, confront the truth about what hurt you, and begin the healing process through forgiveness. When we release our disappointments to God and choose forgiveness, we make room for freedom, healing, and hope to grow. The Beauty of Forgiveness You've probably heard the saying, "Holding onto unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." While unforgiveness often feels like protection, it actually keeps us trapped in the very pain we're trying to avoid. Forgiveness doesn't excuse what happened, but it does release you from carrying the weight of the offense. In marriage and close relationships, forgiveness isn't optional—it's essential. The people closest to us have the greatest access to our hearts, which means they also have the greatest capacity to hurt us. Yet Scripture reminds us that "love covers a multitude of sins" (1 Peter 4:8). What Disappointment Can Teach Us As difficult as disappointment is, God can use it to develop something powerful within us. Romans 5:3-5 teaches that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance builds character, and character produces hope. When we learn to endure relational disappointments instead of being defined by them, we grow stronger, wiser, and more resilient. We begin to trust that God can redeem even the most painful circumstances and work them together for our good (Romans 8:28). If you've been carrying disappointment, hurt, or unforgiveness, this conversation will encourage you to take the next step toward healing and rediscover the hope that God has for you. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Learn the 7 Secrets to Build a Lasting Marriage here. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

I want you to have the clarity, consistency, and cooperation you need to avoid confusion, consequences, and chaos should you decide to do an in-home separation. Navigating an in-home separation is not an easy process, but sometimes, due to financial constraints, children with special needs, or unique life circumstances, it may be the best option. As someone who is 100% pro marriage and always rooting for reconciliation, I want you to be equipped as much as possible during this challenging season. You’ll hear me break down nine tips to have a better success rate during your in-home separation, including how to define your purpose for separating, set clear boundaries, create a timeline, and prioritize individual healing and growth. I’ll walk you through the importance of establishing communication rhythms and creating metrics to track progress, right down to dividing household responsibilities and discussing how to navigate parenting together under one roof. I'll also talk about why crucial conversations—sometimes with the help of a therapist, coach, or pastor—are necessary if you want to give your marriage the best shot at restoration. Whether you’re considering an in-home separation or already in the midst of one, this episode is packed with practical, faith-based advice to help you plan, communicate, and make decisions that are healthy for both you and your spouse. Don't forget—divorce isn’t your only option, and a purposeful in-home separation can be part of your journey back to each other. Resources Mentioned During This Episode: Ep. 406: How to Do a Separation the S.M.A.R.T Way Get my new book, Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples , and take your marriage from blah to better. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

In this episode, I'm sharing my step-by-step plan for navigating a marriage separation with wisdom and clarity. Separation is never something we hope for, but sometimes it can feel like the last exit before divorce. I’m covering the exact conversations you need to have before separating—from setting boundaries and making living arrangements to talking about finances, kids, and even how (and if!) to tell friends and family. I break down why knowing your "why" behind the separation is crucial, how to communicate difficult decisions with your spouse, and the importance of having clear start and end dates (plus regular checkpoints) to help you measure progress. I also talk candidly about common mistakes couples make and share encouragement and hope for those who feel like reconciliation is impossible. If you or someone you know is considering separation, this episode will equip you with practical tools, seasoned advice, and hope to make the process as healthy as possible. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Learn from other couples just like you who made it through when you get my new book, Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples Episode 406: How to do Separation in Marriage the S.M.A.R.T Way Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

It's a subject most of us would rather avoid—but sometimes, we have to face it head-on: separation in marriage. When might it be necessary, how do you do it with purpose, and why every rough patch isn't a reason to separate. You’ll hear me break down the three main reasons I believe separation could be warranted—adultery, abuse, and addiction—and I’ll also share why things like boredom, apathy, or just feeling weary in your marriage are not strong enough reasons to walk away. I get real about my own story, including a time when Shaun and I tried in-home separation (spoiler alert: we did it all wrong!) I also lay out the S.M.A.R.T goals framework—yes, the same one you hear about in business or personal development—as a step-by-step, purposeful plan to help you approach separation with clarity. I also walk you through some practical conversations you need to have if you’re considering a separation: What about the kids? How should you handle finances? What’s the deal with sex or dating during a separation? If you’re in a spot where you’re thinking about separating from your spouse, or maybe you know someone who is, this is the episode you need to hear. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Grab my free Conversation Starters for Couples in Conflict. Pick up my new book, Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples. An excellent resource for marriages in the middle, with practical strategies to help you build a thriving marriage—even after separation. Think your spouse might be unfaithful or in the stages of rebuilding after an affair? Download my free resource: From Heartbreak to Healing: A 12-Step Affair Recovery Checklist. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Are you constantly tempted to go through your spouse's phone or emails? If your partner has been unfaithful—or if you’re struggling with distrust and paranoia after betrayal—this is very normal, but is it the best way to determine when to rebuild trust? A listener wrote in asking this very question as she shared her struggle after infidelity. Even after her husband’s affair, she finds herself obsessively checking his phone, car, and emails, desperately searching for signs he’s being truthful. In this episode, I'm tackling why these behaviors can be re-traumatizing, how they keep you stuck in a cycle of mistrust, and what it really takes to break free. Key Takeaways: The difference between being truly concerned and just feeling paranoid Why going through your spouse’s phone becomes an addiction after infidelity How to stop the cycle of self-betrayal and reclaim your peace The vital role of prayer and trusting God when you can’t trust your spouse My proven formula for rebuilding trust: good behavior over time Ways to give both yourself and your spouse grace during the healing process If you find yourself wrestling with trust after an affair, or if you just can’t seem to move past the hurt, this episode will give you hope and tools to move forward. I’m also inviting you to write in your own marriage questions—your story matters and you’re not alone! Have a question? Email me at info@danache.com, and I might answer it in an upcoming show! Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Learn more and get started with my Infidelity Intensive course . Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .

Ever wonder why you keep having the same fights about money, the kids, or even just feeling ignored? My guest, marriage therapist and Christian wives coach Beatriz Vargas says there are five core questions behind every argument in marriage. Borrowing from renowned attachment-theory expert Sue Johnson's model, these questions can transform even the most hopeless-feeling, disconnected relationships. Beatriz explains how knowing these questions beforehand is a game-changer, and she also shares her powerful personal story of walking through marital struggle, separation, and ultimately, restoration. Beatriz and I break down how every marital conflict, big or small, boils down to one of five foundational questions every spouse is asking—often without even realizing it. We’re talking: Why feeling valued, needed, and cherished is non-negotiable for a healthy marriage How to recognize and break free from the “roommate syndrome” so many couples fall into The role of prayer and honest self-reflection when things seem hopeless How over-spiritualizing can sometimes get us stuck—and what healthy vulnerability looks like instead Practical ways to talk through arguments and change the narrative in your relationship Whether you’re the wife who feels like she’s carrying it all, or the spouse worried that you’re growing further apart, this conversation is for you. Beatriz Vargas even shares exactly where you can download the five core questions to bring these breakthrough conversations to your own marriage. If you’re ready for real talk with real hope for rebuilding trust, connection, and love—even when it feels impossible—press play now! Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Download the Five Core Questions for Every Marriage: thegracefueledwife.com/questions Connect with Beatriz Vargas on all platforms at The Grace Fueled Wife Get your copy of my new book, Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples ! Available in e-book, paperback, and audiobook. Follow Dana Che on the socials! Instagram Facebook YouTube Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review! Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/ Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us .