The Tennis Tragic

The Tennis Tragic #077 / The Retirement Plan / What will we do when it's all over? When our body and spirit can no longer hold up to the rigors of life on tour? This week, we learned that Gael Monfils will be working in wealth management; Stefanos Tsitsipas, meanwhile, will be starting the Society for the Preservation of the One-Handed Backhand. Call him if you have a child with a one-hander. He can help. Meanwhile, Matte and David welcome former Upset Game World Number One Ian Macnider behind the curtain and onto the pod! We discuss Ian's observations about the US Open thus far, and try to pry for secrets of the Upset Game - only to be rewarded with one sports cliche after another. Alas. We touch briefly on the fashion on display at the Open, from Alcaraz's nipple exposure to Naomi's Allen Iverson inspired walk-on outfit; discuss Alcaraz's dirge through five-setters in the latter hours, and imagine a tennis match that goes on literally forever.* Visit the Tragic Archive at ⁠tennistragic.com⁠ * Play the Upset Game at ⁠upsetgame.com⁠ * Follow us on Instagram @tennistragicpod

The Tennis Tragic brings you its 2026 US Open Draw Show, coming hot on the heels of a delightful Fan Week. We recap post-match expressions of platonic love, the joy and the struggle of fighting through the Qualifying round, and the lighthearted stakes-free practice matches that kick off an event filled with great intensity and meaning. Then, we provide comprehensive coverage of every quarter of both singles draws, identify interesting matchups, and remind the audience of our very deep connections and personal feelings about particular players. Did you know that Jack Kennedy is short and Lloyd Harris is tall? And we're not talking about Lloyd Harris the art collector here! * Visit the Tragic Archive at tennistragic.com * Play the Upset Game at upsetgame.com * Follow us on Instagram @tennistragicpod

The Tennis Tragic #075 / The Diamond Episode / David and Matte get together to celebrate their 75th episode with the Tennis Tragic! We revisit our dreams of making it to the Tennis Podcast Hall of Fame one day, while recognizing the reality that we're still just grinding away on the Futures Tour. It is both a time for renewal and a time for long fade-outs in the world of professional tennis. We take time to enjoy the recent emergence of Sara Bejlek, Alexandra Eala and Brandon Nakashima and discuss the dwindling relevance of doubles as a tennis medium and the Williams sisters continued engagement with the sport. Finally, we check on Upset Game rankings and look forward to seeing Alcaraz's long flowing locks at the US Open, hoping to live in a Darkness-free world. * Visit the Tragic Archive at tennistragic.com * Play the Upset Game at upsetgame.com * Follow us on Instagram @tennistragicpod

The Tennis Tragic #074 / Hello Upended Earth / Matte and David gather in advance of Wimbledon 2026 to discuss the state of the world, and how everything is forever changed. The Knicks won the championship. Zverev won a Major. Nothing will ever be the same. Also: Roger does a Tennis Tarot reading for the All-England Club, big things are predicted for Muchova and Eala, and big first titles are won by Robin Montgomery and Alejandro Davidovich Fokina. Finally, we debate the value of the question "What does [this victory] mean to you?" and grapple with Marketa Vondrousova's 4-year doping ban for a missed test, leading Matte to propose a socialist revolution. Visit the Tennis Tragic archive at www.tennistragic.com Follow us on Instagram @tennistragicpod

The Tennis Tragic #073 / Is There a God? / Will the Knicks win a championship for the first time in 53 years? Are we entering Zverev's Second Age of Darkness, or is this actually the first? Do the outcomes we observe indicate the presence or absence of a higher power? Also: Mirra thanks herself, David has a religious experience, Matte casts a spell for Cobolli, and we re-examine the power and mystery of the Tennis Tarot.

The Tennis Tragic #072 / The King of Balls / David and Matte finally reconvene to discuss Marco Trungelliti's triumphant rise to glory (and fall to Jodar). Roger draws a three-card Tennis Tarot spread. Who is the real King of Balls? Which Rising Star will arrive too soon? And in a world where the Upset Game exists, will The Upset be the defining characteristic of the 2026 Roland Garros narrative? We discuss Sinner's blessings, Alcaraz's curse, and Goffin's farewell, as well as progress on Tragic Tennis, and the Knicks juggernaut on the doorstep of glory.

The Tennis Tragic #071 / We Digress / Butch Buchholz. Who is Butch Buchholz? Matte and David discuss recent events, including Sabalenka stealing the Upset Game title for David at Indian Wells, the Tennis Robot picking the Opelka Servebot at Miami, and various other tangential topics. Johnny Five, Cooperstown Tarot, sycophancy, "chalk", the Upset Game demographic, Slay the Spire 2, SOUL.md, Peter Falk, the Matildas. Roger paints a picture of himself.

The Tennis Tragic #070 / The Crunching Sound / David and Matte leave voicemails for each other and accidentally make a podcast. Tsitsipas defeats Medvedev, which means nothing. David recounts his two weeks as a curling tragic. David and Matte discuss the merits of dentistry. Matte shatters his phone under a car while recording the sounds of his city. Mensik stuns Sinner, Denmark pretends it is a summery Scandinavian country, Atmane loses a match on the umpire's call, B-surnames have a big week, and Tiafoe goes Hard 75 but loses the Pear to Cobolli. David's back persists. A video game is coming. The green man flashes.

The Tennis Tragic #069 / Fading Into Her Prime / Matte and David find a little time to recap the 2026 Australian Open... eventually! But first... Matte tries to cast a spell, and fails to influence the #1 tennis tournament for vampires. David speculates about Sinner's potential dominance in ice tennis. We talk about cramp, ski jumping, the Super Bowl, the T20 World Cup, Serena's potential comeback, people who peaked in high school, how to build a better mop, and recap the latest Upset Game.

The Tragic Three reconvene for the first time in a long time, to pay tribute to Milos Raonic (sort of), marvel at Roger Federer (yet again), and unveil the 2026 Tragedy Watchlist as we move into the first Major of the year down under. We discuss Matte's unfortunate withdrawal from the One Point Slam, Alex's United Cup experience in Sydney, and David's brief dalliance with a 125 in Austin. We share our enjoyment of the One Point Slam (despite its ridiculous length) and our disdain for the (new, pointless) Battle of the Sexes.

The Tennis Tragic #067 / Bidi Labubu Badu / Matte and David meet to talk about the style selections on show at the 2025 US Open. First, Ian collects his plate graciously, while Adi slides into his World Number One ranking with a US Open trophy and an impassioned Rublev defense. Then, we break out the slide projector and chat Naomi's kit, Andre Swagassi, the Y3 "blur tool" design, Alcaraz as "happy Buddha", Magdalena Frech's Bidi Badu dress, Kostyuk's popped Wilson collar, and all of Venus's glory. David confesses to the superiority of Test Cricket, while Matte explains the difference between a tie and a draw and shares his experience at a silent meditation retreat.

The Tennis Tragic #066 / The Tribunal of Tennis Etiquette / Matte and David begin the hard work of establishing a committee for regulating behavior on a tennis court (and in the stands). Given their recent statements and actions, as well as their consistent efforts to model proper behavior for others, we feel that Jelena Ostapenko, Stefanos Tsitsipas, and Daniil Medvedev should be on the board. Who better to correct us gently and kindly during our missteps? We also give Taylor Townsend her flowers, take a call from Adi about the Upset Game's impact on his fandom, look forward to Coco vs Naomi, talk about tennis redheads, express excitement about Venus and Leylah playing doubles, and channel Charlton Heston receiving the Ten Commandments from God.

The Tennis Tragic #065 / Return to Doubles Alley / The US Open spotlight shines brightest on the Mixed Doubles exhibition (tournament). Matte and David re-visit the dark and mysterious zone between the tram lines, while glancing back at the US hardcourt summer and peeking forward towards the upcoming major (a little). We get into the depths of the upset game, discuss radical-but-unlikely future rule changes, express confusion about the identity of our podcast, learn some Australian taxi-based idioms, and revisit Matte's encounter with Australian doubles star Ellen Perez on line at an event merchandise store. In a rank? On line? Finally, Matte foreshadows some upcoming spells.

The Tennis Tragic #064 / Goran's Knee / Must we suffer for our art? Have we been coddled, and can we triumph in spite of our soft hearts? The great ship Wimbledon finds itself mid-stream. Matt finds the random button, and we all discover August Holmgren as a result. Players get more serious about the Upset Game. Marin Cilic pauses and we flashback to the Match That Time Forgot. Arthur Rinderknech stops the darkness, while Laura Siegemund practices the dark arts. A fishing trip organized by Craig Boynton is described. Goran Ivanisevic dishes out some tough love (on one leg). Trinity Rodman gazes lovingly at Ben Shelton. Matte and David consider a lateral career move and re-imagine the Tennis Tragic as a Tennis Podcast Podcast.

The Tennis Tragic #063 / What's in the Trophy? / Coco Gauff triumphs in Paris and discovers that the Coupes des Mousquetaires has a lid. David and Matte battle difficult conditions - the same as every other podcaster - to cover the outstanding women's final, Lois Boisson's delightful run, Amelie Mauresmo and Gilles Moretton's handling of the schedule, and the looming threat of a Carlos/Jannik duopoly on the men's side. We also find time to touch on podium architecture, courtside paintings, and commisioning Christopher Clarey to pen the biography of Upset Game World Number 1 and French Open Champion, Ian Macnider. Might as well get started now!

The Tennis Tragic #062 / Best Story of Roland Garros (So Far) / Darkness descends upon Paris, and lightning strikes! Matte and David meander through the topics of the day - the draw, the Upset Game, Gasquet, Djokovic's 100th title, Maya Joint's chances vs Jasmine Paolini, Hubie "The Retirement Plan" Hurkacz, McEnroe and the New York Knicks, Adi's victory speeches for his Upset Game dirty double, and the holy power of the new Pope blessing Jannik Sinner.

The Tennis Tragic #038 / The Kid Stopped Dreaming / Rafa and Ash concluded the 2022 Australian Open with two perfect days of tennis, but defeated Daniil's childhood dream may have died in the process. David and Matte discuss the Special K's, the theoretical value of tennis etiquette, coaching from the box, string tension, Daniil's somber press conference, whether one would rather win a 250 or defeat Roger Federer in the first round, Mark Shorter's painting of Ash Barty's fist, David's feelings about Rafa's aesthetic, and our loss of credibility following Episode 037's audacious predictions.

The Tennis Tragic #061 / Hey Ump! Got a Light? / From Dubai to Acapulco, from Indian Wells to Miami, from Buenos Aires to Rio de Janeiro... David and Matte travel the world in their imagination, recapping and reliving recent events. Matte pays tribute to Richard Gasquet in advance of his final Roland Garros. David updates the world on the Upset Game "Race to Milan." Francisco Comesana beats back the darkness with a smoke. Niche tennis cosplay ideas are shared. Wayne Ferreira's revenge tour continues. Joao Fonseca is passionately anointed. Mirra Andreeva thanks herself; we thank Conchita Martinez. Join us for the Upset Game next week in Madrid! upsetgame.com

The Tennis Tragic #60 / Sunset Diarrhea / Matte and David forget to celebrate their diamond anniversary episode, instead choosing to focus a critical eye on the fashion of the 2025 Australian Open. Needless to say, we came away a bit disappointed. We also talk about Madison Keys' thrilling triumph, fake corporate fans, get tragic updates from the "experts" on the Juniors and Doubles events, and hand out some hardware for the first ever live running of the Upset Game (congrats to Hit Em High for taking home the trophy!). Finally, we touch on the possibility of a new age of darkness (mercifully averted after the episode was recorded).

The Tennis Tragic #059 / L'ouef-Fifteen (A Beginner's Guide) / In this episode, David and Matte welcome all newcomers into the wonderful world of tennis, because tennis is cool, and everyone should l'ouef it passionately, as we do. We roll out a comprehensive "Beginner's Guide" to the Australian Open. If you don't know where you are, or what you are doing ... go no further! We clearly and comprehensively break down tennis etiquette, the scoring system, and provide a framework for maximum enjoyment during your first live Grand Slam experience. We also discuss bits and bobs of the AO25 draw through the lens of our Upset Game players' picks. This episode is dedicated to our most engaged listener to date (next to Holger Rune's mother), Ian Macnider. Thanks for listening, and for playing the Upset Game, Ian! Like an unseeded doubles partnership languishing in obscurity, we are both delighted and mystified at the thought that anybody is aware of our existence.